Tutoring Isn’t Helping My Child | Long Island Neuropsychologist

Oct 7

You noticed your child was having a hard time, so you did what most parents would do.

You got them help.

Maybe you hired a reading tutor. Added extra math support. Worked with them at home. Met with the school. Put accommodations in place. Your child may already have an IEP or receive extra help during the school day.

For a while, you hoped it would be enough.

But now another school year is underway, and you are seeing the same struggles again.

Homework still takes too long. Reading is still harder than it should be. Writing is frustrating. Your child needs more help than you expected.

And you are starting to wonder:

“If we are doing all of this, why are they still struggling?”

More Help Is Not Always the Same as the Right Help

Tutoring can be extremely helpful when we know what a child needs.

But when a child continues to struggle despite good instruction and extra support, it may be time to look beyond simply adding more tutoring.

The problem may not be how much help your child is receiving.

It may be that no one has clearly identified what is making learning difficult in the first place.

A child struggling to read because of Dyslexia may need something very different from a child whose reading difficulties are related to attention or language.

A student who avoids writing may have Dysgraphia, difficulty organizing their ideas, or another weakness affecting written work.

A child who understands the material but cannot seem to manage assignments independently may be struggling with ADHD or Executive Functioning.

Until you understand the reason, it can feel like you are constantly trying new solutions.

“But They’re So Smart.”

This is where many parents become especially frustrated.

Your child may have an incredible vocabulary. They may be curious, creative, and able to understand complicated ideas.

Then they sit down to do schoolwork and everything changes.

A writing assignment takes two hours.

They read a chapter but cannot tell you what happened.

They studied all weekend and still did poorly on the test.

They forgot to hand in the assignment you watched them complete.

That gap between what you know your child can do and what they are actually showing at school is often what finally leads parents to seek more answers.

For some children, particularly those with very strong abilities, a Gifted / 2E Evaluation can help explain why strengths in some areas exist alongside unexpected weaknesses in others.

Look at What It Takes for Your Child to Keep Up

Grades only tell you part of the story.

A child may be earning As and Bs while receiving:

tutoring several times a week
extensive help with homework
repeated reminders
test preparation from a parent
accommodations at school
extra academic support

The question is not only:

“Are they keeping up?”

Ask:

“How much help does it take for them to keep up?”

If your child is working much harder than expected and still struggling, that is useful information.

At Some Point, Parents Want Answers

There comes a point when trying another tutor or waiting another marking period does not feel like enough.

You want to know:

Why isn't reading improving faster?

Why is writing still so difficult?

Why doesn't my child's school performance match their ability?

Why do they need so much help to function independently?

Are we even addressing the right problem?

This is where a Neuropsychological Evaluation can be helpful.

Rather than starting with a diagnosis, the evaluation starts with the questions you have about your child.

The goal is to understand their strengths, identify what is getting in the way, and determine what type of support makes sense moving forward.

If your child has already been evaluated through school but you still have unanswered questions, you may also want to read School vs. Private Evaluations.